Hares—Bottom Feeder and PelagicHashers—Pushup(Bra), Phonebox, Licked Dick and SevenUp It was a cold and rainy Sunday afternoon, and the Laohe mountain was covered in clouds. It looked like as though it was going to be a rainy hash with only the “not so smart

Hares: Mickey (Mouse) and Doggie (Style)
Runners: Kevin, Nick, Jessica, Jerry

Imagine a sky grey like cigarette ash. And now, in the tiny rooms of the hearts of four courageous runners standing shivering at the corner of Hefang street and Yan’an Road, imagine a string quartet, the music soft, but driving, waxing and waning in tune with motivations of the hashers to actually start running on this blustery, cold, and heartless day. However, dear readers, fear not, for our runners, after a bit of huffing and hawing, embarked upon the journey laid out before them by Hares Doggie(style) and Mickey(mouse) – but not without some apprehension after being told that along the trail another set of arrows had been marked by someone else. Multiple explanations were offered: Shanghai hashers, a school group, some smartass with a piece of chalk and a penchant for mischief greater than that of hashers, but the true reason was never discovered. The trail first took our undaunted runners through the orgy of shopping that is Hefang street, through the crowds of Chinese people baffled by the four runners tearing ass through the street, screaming incomprehensible incantations behind them as they made on their merry way. Several intersections proved troublesome, but dear readers, our runners are used to searching under car tires for chalk arrows, and with a bit of cursing by the virgin runner, the runners carried on in the strange ritual.
Taking a turn up into the woods, the runners came upon a WC regroup, which was well utilized according to the designs of the hares. The trail was well marked, even abundantly due to aforementioned arrows placed by other party, which never upset the delicate balance of our cool-headed runners’ emotions. The confusion of the dueling arrow sets climaxed in a “chutes and ladders”-like sequence with the complexity of “read it and wipe” logic puzzlers designed to be solved on the can. After several deriding false trails, careening out of control down several steep streets, the runners were vomited out upon a well-received On-On Home. Upon seeing this, the runners jauntily made their way back to the eagerly awaiting hares. They finished in almost exactly one hour fifteen minutes, winning the arrival bet for Doggie, who estimated that time exactly.
After donning several extra layers, the Hares and Hounds waited eagerly for the arrival of the Tianmushan contingent (Jackie, Pushup(bra), Phonebox, and the now named 7up). Acro, claiming an injured ankle and expressing concern over the amount of beer provided by the hares for only a total of seven people, showed up just in time for the arrival of the Tianmushan-ers. Upon their arrival, the circle was convened by Doggie, and preparations were made for the very public (read: middle of the square) donning of a good number of beer coats. Down-downs first went to the Hares, although there really wasn’t too much berating to be done. A Down-down went to the virgin Nick, the physically Biggest Virgin (two meters) in Hangzhou Hash history, although Bottom Feeder wasn’t available for his traditional virgin speech due to some ominous sounding emergency apartment hunting. Doggie presided over a solemnly comfortable naming ceremony for the now-dubbed 7up. Narratives of the weekend were given by the Tianmushan-ers, and Jackie’s was especially berated for its length. However, the pack readily accepted the “liberal” new family consisting of Papa Pushup, Mama Doggie(style), and sisters Jackie, 7up, and Phonebox. Otherwise, the Down-downs were given in relatively rapid succession, as there was in fact a good bit of beer, and it was cold enough to warrant quick application of beer coats. Upon the finishing of the circle, the pack left under full steam for a nearby Chinese restaurant, where a hearty and loud dinner was enjoyed. After said dinner, and many a strange look from the natives trying to enjoy a peaceful Sunday night dinner, the decision was made to form a taxi cavalcade bound for Maya bar. Other than ragging on Nick the virgin for bringing a certain much boasted of and – at least to Jackie and this story weaver – a disappointing “special lady friend,” drinks at the Maya bar were enjoyed in the normal manner of hashers worldwide – with gusto.

On-On!

kevin

Hares: Gerry, Push-up (Bra) – Hashers: Bottom feeder, Pelagic, Rhian, Lillian, Kevin, Skidmarks and virgins Eva, Miki, Jessica Wan

It was a pleasant November Sunday, perfect hashing weather. The pack assembled in front of the Holiday Inn, and I showed up late though I am the one who lives nearest. The trail started out innocently enough just along the Feng qi Road leading to the Fengqi crosshead Bridge, then we passed a small park, and an overhead pass above the railway. Soon we entered the agricultural university, and the most of the remainder of the trail wove around inside it (good trail, hares!), where a long time search for arrows on ground and trees commenced. What we found were two tricky circles on the ground, and one even with wavy trace inside – indicating swimming or boating? With Bottom Feeder’s guidance, we successfully found the way out. The well-hided arrow passed through a building and leading a way to one side-gate of the university, which was just another “ FT