#5 The Return to Maya Rehashed

The usual straggle of hashers found their way to the Maya using Polynesian time pieces. John returned after a 3 week absence, and soon covered himself in glory by losing the trail after just 300 metres. The rest of the pack swore blindly that they spent 20 minutes searching Shuguang for wayward John, but even Pierot would have had difficulty with the conflicting evidence. Meanwhile it looked like the running group would soon lose touch with the walking group but courtesy of the usual blunders such as the above, the groups stayed together. Co-hare Little Drunken Apple soon picked up the trail laying technique with flour and chalk being sprayed around with random enthusiasm on all surfaces horizontal and vertical, trees, dozing picnickers and focussed card players. Now the objective of the hares was to keep the pack out for at least an hour, but never to take them further than 1 click from the start. Thus the trail went east and into the bush, then went south-west until about back to the Maya, but about 200m behind, then south-east to the ridge, then north-east to the summit of Xixia Hill and then east on the little travelled ridge along to the Tea House, and then back on the south side of the ridge south west until Beishan was attained, hence Shuguang and back to the Maya. There was an obvious regroup at the obvious lookout over the Su causeway; the view one of the luxuries of hashing in Hangzhou. New runners were Lee, Dad Geoff, Ross and Laura the linguist, all firmly attached to the running group with more than the usual care by BF.

Grandmaster Pete was finally named, preceded by a dissertation on the difficulties of procreation in the UK without a generous dollop of alcohol. In the case of Novocastrians it means Newcastle Brown, alias the dog, hence the GM being christened Doggie Style; his only comment was that his mother would be proud, lending weight to the argument. Phone Box went out of her way to remain disconnected for the circle. Otherwise the fluidity of accusations and counter accusations in the circle was strangely constricted, given certain unusual circumstances that reined in BFs normal verbal extravagances. Some time later rain forced the crowd inside to the much gloomier bar, where BF was seen on the phone berating Acronymph for her no-show, she having the last laugh by that phone then being lost. BF also left behind the drinks trough while scribe left behind the down down mugs, both elements collected by DS acting as sweeper.

#4 Green Tea Restaurant – Rehashed

 Turnout 7

The Green Tea restaurant is a great venue, when you find it. Scribe had only been there previously at night in a self created fog, and so, having abandoned the cab some couple of Ks short of the destination with crook leg and carton of biggies called co-hare Pete for help who fortuitously was passing in own cab, equally piloted by a cabbie new to Lingyin Rd. The lane attained, at the end of which was found a restaurant that looked very little like that from memory, however it did not prevent beer and belongings being stashed behind the bar, albeit the wrong bar, an error not made by the pack assembling later at the correct establishment. Bottom Feeder, in the search for a private changing room, quaintly chose the middle of the adjoining tea field to change his strides, while negotiations to secure ice for the on on drinks drifted on, and on. The pack was finally away at 16.25, and felt their way initially past the Hangzhou Tyrolean quarter, before a check, and into a tea field, on the other side of which was found a track past the now ubiquitous tombs. Your scribe is loathe to inform the pack that at this stage the hares remained unsure as to the run taking either a clockwise or counter clockwise direction. Some rather suspect bearings taken from lake landmarks and correlated against a complementary hotel map turned out to absolutely useless, and the pack duly found itself on the summit of Tianma Hill, now hash-named Serendipity Peak. Those romantic souls in the pack marked this spot for future reference, but for today it was just on on down. Trailmarking blunders along this next stretch of stone track are probably best left unreported. Then off the stone track onto some ancient byway, descending finally into the classic bamboo forest, and then further along Nongfu creek. The trail meandered back to Meiling Road about 100m from where the outbound trail entered the tea fields, breaking any number of run setting rules, and confusing half the pack with an ambiguous mark, Little Drunken Apple choosing the letter of the mark rather than the proximity of home as his guide. (Rule  – never overestimate the intelligence of the pack). 

Meanwhile back at the Green Tea, ice was in short supply so warm beer was on the menu for the circle, a suitable location chosen which ended up a car park. Nate, mate of BF joined the circle from somewhere 24 hours train travel distant, while the pack exhibited the usual personality defects which made the circle down downs slip past, warm beer and all. HPs name was amended to Acronymph, which passed the test by not being liked at all by the recipient, while Natalie, answering 11 phone calls in a row, against all circle rules, was named Phone Box which may equally have something to do with her hang ups. This name also passed that important test. The booking time at the Green Tea had meanwhile passed, and the table lost, so the GM Pete’s decision was “back to the Maya?, where BF was able to test his linguistic diagnosis skills on another Dutchman, placing him unerringly in Connecticut, while placing a Kiwi in Tasmania, an insult to both parties. Non antipodean hashers may be interested in the Piggy Muldoon quote that Kiwi migration to Australia improves the IQ of both countries. On on.

Run #4 – Green Tea Restaurant
Address: 31 Lingyin Road

24th June @ 16:00

Hare: Pushup & Pete.

#3 Bottom-Feeder’s Place – Rehashed

Run # 3 Turnout – 2+2+2 (2 hares + 2 hounds + 2 non-runners) – The Jazz BarHP was a virgin hare on this momentous day when the number of hares equalled the number of hounds. Her co-hare scribe was accused later in the circle of taking a virgin into the tombs, but said in his defence that he didn’t know that at the time. The desultory turnout does not augur well for the future, because if the current decline in numbers continues, next week there will be a turnout of -5. Natalie made new ground in HZH3 history by choosing to simultaneously come for her first run and yet not run. Ivy was a welcome arrival, when things were looking very grim, and Bottom Feeder was the last arrival with the drinks trough, reporting that Skidmarks was seen around the corner with a tennis racket, forsaking the hash.  When Ivy and BF finally took off on a very late start, scribe Pushup sought to guide them past the checks and FTs after the time warp forest shack with birdcage. In fact the 2 hounds were found creeping through a factory compound, well off the path. They regaled your scribe with tales of fierce rabid dogs, which proved to be a Bottom Feeder ambit claim, as all that was found was the forester tending his birds. The trail wended past a variety of tombs strewn up the wooded hill side until it was a bush bash to another tomb area and the climb to the top of Laohe Hill and regroup, unnecessary for a pack of 2. The clogged atmosphere filtered what would have been a fine view, but beggars can’t be choosers, you take what you can. The FT at the top was overkill in keeping the pack together, before the descent down “mesmerising staircase?. Upon entering the University grounds, HP displayed some devious trail setting by dropping the pack off a 2.5m wall, but then after shaming her co-hare into the leap, went to water and SCBed. The trail from here was a jog through the Uni grounds and down Yugu Rd. back to the Jazz Bar, for about an hour out.

During the Down Downs it became necessary to physically restrain Natalie from joining every Down Down. There were numerous accusations of unhashlike behaviour, from dress to language, with Bottom Feeder’s imagination running wild, as it would after a 4 hour English coaching session. Those Sunday students will end up with a particularly idiosyncratic speaking and presentation style. HP’s age became a question for those students of female form, although the age discussion got well out of hand when the senior member of the group was treated somewhat disrespectfully. A muso looking chap strolled up, turned out to be Eddie, BF’s flatmate, who had to assure Ivy that his dreadlocks were connected to his head, and not his bandana. Snippets of information about domestic bliss in this eccentric household all involved strong Chinese drink. Then Carlos appeared, mit in hand to prove a higher calling than the hash. They’re a sporting crowd these non-runners. It was hamburgers at 20 paces from the Jazz Bar, and thanks to the Jazz Bar management for allowing their front door to be polluted by this weird mob, without much trade in compensation.

#2 The Eastern Shore – Rehashed

Run #2 – Turnout 8 – The Paradise BarDribs and drabs of hashers from Run #1 appeared along with new runner HP. Hare Carlos and co-hare scribe worked out a strategy in setting this trail which lasted about 200 metres when the foot and vehicular traffic at Qinchun Rd proved to be a natural check for the pack of 6. The Red Light district that scribe had assiduously discovered proved to be too far off the trail as did the odd cave and cliff, so the trail basically held fast for Baochu Hill, ascending the earthen paths to the pagoda. Bottom Feeder was first in to a Regroup on one rocky pinnacle where he shared Kentucky Fried with a still nonplussed family. Up over the dominant rock feature looking over the lake, through the narrows and down into a saddle where a circle check brought the pack to a confused halt. It was then On On down via some earthen tracks to Beishan Rd for a scenic jog back to Hubin Rd and the Paradise Bar. At the circle, GM Peter unkindly suggested that the hares had failed to provide a clear and consistent trail for the 6 pack pack to follow, and the consequent level of anxiety suffered by said pack had to be compensated for by a large Down Down. Whether Sunday afternoon crowds at Hubin Rd noticed the rowdy crew outside the

Paradise was unknown, although HP noted that she had better get used to being stared at in the company of loony laowei. Big Bang Theory was christened, and it is hoped she will take seriously her responsibility to enlighten members. Little Drunken Apple was the outstanding Down Downer, however, the pack completely failed with a consistent Down Down song, it can only go up from here. The pack adjourned to the third floor where Bottom Feeder demonstrated his linguistic skills by placing a diner by his accent to somewhere in the NE USA. The diner was certainly surprised by this as he came from Utrect, his Dutch vowels clear to all but BF. The conversation drifted from national issues to personal failings over the following hours, but answers to neither were found, despite Skidmarks best efforts. Score for the today’s run. 6 for the run, 8 for the On On, 7 for the food (what was it anyway?) and 10 for the suspect Monday, average 7.8.

#1 Rehashed

The inaugural run of the Hangzhou Hash House Harriers was held on the 2nd of June 2007 from the Maya Bar, to whom the hash is grateful for hospitality and assistance. There were many photos taken on the day, so in order to collate a reasonable collection for publication on this website, please email your best shots to Pushup on chrisknud _at_ gmail _dot_ com.

So, our inaugural hash, how to immortalise this portentous occasion. Virgin grand masters, virgin hare, no hash cash to speak off and a last minute t-shirt delivery just to get us started. The lack of experience was everywhere to be seen and poor old push-up trying to keep us all afloat.

The hares, M the virgin and Pushup with his vast experience had allegedly set off to mark the trail but no one who had seen M leaving 1944 at 06:30 that morning was believing any of it. A phone call from the top of ‘some hill’ 20 minutes before zero hour didn’t bode well.

Yours truly stood up and mumbled something to the impatient pack and by 15:30 we were under way. 21 of us including a few brave hashmen from Nanjing and Shanghai who turned out to lend much needed support.

The trail set was, to this uneducated eye, quite well conceived. The vision of us all running across the busiest hillside in Hangzhou yelling “on, on!” to one another is a vision that myself, and I expect quite a few of Hangzhou’s tourists visitors from last Saturday will carry with us for sometime to come.

The hares had neglected to mention at the start line that we needed crampons and rope so the, er, ‘rock feature’ served in lieu of the re-groups rather well. Most people managed to fall off the side of it gracefully, as clearly at least one of hares hadn’t managed by the looks of the half a kilo of suspicious white powder down one side. Thankfully only one person lost his ring and only Hannah and LittleDrunkApple felt the need to slide down on their elbows.

Those of us running up last, *coughs* to ensure nobody was lost, managed to miss part of the trail out when a bunch of tired looking folks traipsed across our path on their way back up the hillside and we all managed to finish more or less together despite the absence of another rock-feature to re-group the pack.

Back at Maya the cooler of beer was going down rather worryingly quickly as the circle began. “Shags On” led the way with penalties for the hares, the trail wetter’s and other miscreants and before long everyone was in on the act. Jessica shall hence forth be known as SkidMarks and Andrew as BottomFeeder. LittleDrunkApple lived up to his name well enough for it to stick.

Shiggy, Caveman, Vomit and Pushup were stars looking after so many virgins. And “Shags On” deserves a special mention for his role as acting RA.

Yours truly made such a particularly shoddy estimation of the beer required (we restocked the cooler no less than four times) that a hash cash has hastily been appointed to look after anything that involves numbers.

All in all a very good day, at least once we were all finally fed.

On, on!

Photos to follow.

#1 Inaugural Hash

The inaugural run of the Hangzhou Hash House Harriers will be held on Saturday the 2nd of June at 15:00. The run will start from Maya Bar:

玛雅酒? (Maya Bar)
曙光路白沙泉94? (94 Baishaquan, Shuguang Rd)

Hangzhou is (or will be) a hash where all are welcome, that meets weekly on a Sunday afternoon (note though the first hash is Saturday NOT Sunday). We’re sort of still working the details out but come along and enjoy the run and we’ll take it from there.

Any questions, or if you’re from out of town and need help finding hotels in Hangzhou then post a comment.

UPDATE 2007-05-23: You’ll be glad to hear we’re making good progress:

  • Pushup and M are going to be the hares and are resolutely not giving anything away.
  • T-shirts are in the pipeline and the plan is to get the order in for the end of the week.
  • We’ve spoke to the nice people at Maya and the beer is sorted.

REQUEST: It will help us to judge numbers if everyone could give us a shout in the comment thread below if they think they are going to make it. In order to be able to comment you’ll need to first register, click ‘Register’ under ‘Meta’ on the right-hand side, this takes about 30 seconds and will stop us from drowning in spam. All suggestions gratefully received.