Run #89 – The Hard Candy Run Rehashed

The pack assembled outside Maya, some with significant feelings of
deja vu from the the previous week. Your scribe, Bestiality, had run
his way there from Hangda lu, desperate to make sure he was not late
for the start. Apparently, I shouldn’t have bothered, as only new
runner Chris awaited me there with the hares, and a small chinese
child who was immensely enjoying looking up peoples trouser legs. Once
I could no longer stand to have my privates inspected, and 15 minutes
had passed, we set off, collecting Sabrina along the way, who must
have been hiding in the shadows.

They say a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. In
hashing, a journey of a thousand check backs can often start with a
single arrow. I had a feeling we might be in for a rough time as the
first arrow pointed directly between two possible routes at a tree,
giving about as clear an indication as the mona lisa’s smile. The
trail was located however, and quickly took us into the bush behind
Maya where an inevitable hill climb followed. Markings were few and
far between, and with a pack of three, it was often the case that all
possible avenues were checked, then rechecked before the next patch of
flour was found. Indeed, so sparse was the flour that I was recalled
to the trail by shouts of on-on to see a clearly marked trail leading
up and back towards where we had come from. Enthusiasm and a clear
trail proved too much for our less inexperienced hashers, and it was
not long before Sabrina was calling back “what does CB mean?” ON-ON we
went, again finding that the only way to locate the flour was to crawl
with magnifying glasses and hope for the best. Sabrina, by far the
most energetic of the hashers disappeared up the trail as I checked
back to the last mark (yet again) and managed to find an arrow at
about the same time I found two specks of flour leading towards a
dirty brick wall. ON-ON it was and the wall was forgotten in favour of
the clean chalk on pavement which quickly lead us back to Shuguan Lu
and home. Let this be a lesson to hares: if your trail is so hard to
find that people can get 200M off the trail and miss your cleverly
laid traps entirely, then you are not laying enough flour. (I think I
have beat that dead horse enough now…)

We encountered Seven-Up at the finish, who was 20 mins late to the
start of the run, and basically hadn’t bothered to try and catch the
pack. This was marginally better than Vulva who was not just late to
the run, but to the circle itself. Sabrina skipped the drinking, but
the rest of us quickly made up for that. An honourable mention to
Chris here for commitment to his fellow runners; instigating a
personal one runner drinks, all runners drink policy that ensured he
got his fair share of the beer. Seven-Up managed to break basically
every circle rule imaginable in her first week as GM; using her phone,
leaving the circle and at one point giving beer to a 3-yr old child.
By far and away her worst crime was not telling all of us to get
stuffed for even mentioning it, as a GM should rule with an iron fist,
usually clamped around a cup of beer! ON-ON!